Judith tells her story of how mental illness affected her and her family
I used to do some terrible things, I would go into the kids bedrooms and rant & rave etc. I went into my daughters room one day and I found a little note where she had written some things about me and she was saying how upset she was, she was starting to blame herself for how I was, she was really really worried. I just wanted to hide myself and put up a big mask so that people didn’t really know what was going on inside. I became even more & more depressed and also anxious as well because I was frightened because if I was going to be around people I would just break down. I was terrified that if I was really really honest that I would be put into hospital and I would be there forever – so I didn’t want to be honest I just wanted to keep it to myself.
What helped me cope during these times was my dog Bob. He was just always there, he didn’t judge me, he was just around me all the time. I could love him and know that he was never going to ask any questions as well. So probably my dog was my best saviour. Patrick was also a very good support for me as well, so he helped me to cope as well because I knew he was there so when I wasn’t feeling safe I knew that he was there.
Patrick having some support really made it easier for me in the long run and it also helped me with the kids because I was extremely worried about them so knowing that HelpingMinds was there and was able to support the whole family really made me feel a lot better.
These days I can tell straight away when I feel like I am going down or if I am getting depressed or anxious and I will look after myself. Knowing that HelpingMinds is there, is not necessarily that I am not alone, but that the most important people to me are not alone. I believe that Patrick would not have survived without HelpingMinds. HelpingMinds was his saviour as well. So inevitably it was our whole family’s saviour.